3rd Party Fantasy

Author notes

#31 Very, very scarry

Evil Emperor Nick

on Feb. 15, 2006

Okay, feeling a little better now so here goes.

Rant

I am by virtue of the requirement for a major at some point in your education. I considered at one point majoring in economics but given that I’ve at time spent $101.24 on cars and game accessories it seemed like a poor subject for me. While economics is a social science that studies the production, distribution, trade and consumption of goods and services, communications as a study is somewhat related and defined as is the academic discipline focused on communication forms, processes and meanings, including speech, interpersonal and organizational communication. "Mass communication" is a more specialized academic discipline focused on the institutions, practice and effects of journalism, broadcasting, advertising, public relations and related mediated communication directed at a large, undifferentiated or segmented audience.

I prefer mass communications which is in essence the art of brainwashing droves of people, though in actually it is easier to just hypnotize your employing into thinking you are brain washing large numbers of people. Mass communications is all about sending a message and making sure your target, whom is affectional viewed a mobile wallet, absorbs that message like a sponge. For along time there were two rival theories which went that this was best achieved by paying successful people to wear your logo and pretend that is made the thinner, sexier and richer or by giving away free T-shirts. However in recent years communications majors (in an effort to prove their major was in fact different from a watered down liberal arts degree) successfully disproved this theory and turned the communications world on its head with the pinnacle achievement in this field; getting consumers to PAY to wear your logo. Thusly a new generation of communications majors successfully created an army of free advertising in the form a highly coveted t-shirts and shoes covered with logos, which ironically have been equated with status. This highly depressed me incidentally as the only way I can now achieve greatness in this field is to some how convince people to randomly act out commercials in public places like the church or the congress.

So I’ve turned my attentions towards inter personal communications. It is a common misconception that this field is totally made of psychological how shall we say indulgences. Mechanically speaking it is the sending, receiving and decoding of information. Thus when one man grunts and another knows that means to get a beer then have succeeded at interpersonal communications. It is of course then, highly ironic that this process which can be studied in trained gorillas almost universally disingrates when opposing genders meet.

Permit me to share come classic examples.

Hi (HI!)
…I’d like to BUT….(My last statement was a lie)
Does this make me look fat? (Compliment me now)
Do you want to….? (I want to……)
What do you think about politics? (Lets have a fight, it will be fun!)
Oh do you know about computers? (I want free help)
It was nice meeting you (Lets never meet again)

Well my time is short here so I’ll have to continue on this subject tomorrow. Declare your majors wisely (Go for money you fools), I’m off to get more plain logo less black clothing (Knowledge has made me mildly insane).