You pry some of the offending matter loose from the little laser-thingie part of the WIRELESS LASER TWO-BUTTON ONE-WHEEL COMPUTER INPUT DEVICE, log-in, use a link to the main part of the forums, and commence browsing.
You are completely unsurprised to find that there haven't been any new posts since the last time you visited. The site is just as dead as it's always been.
But wait, what's this? It looks like two other people, Knight of Eonia and LC, are logged in. The asterisk also indicates they're using the VIRTUAL REALITY mode of the forums. Unfortunately, without a keyboard, you can't interact with them. You might be able to spy on them if you could recall where the SECURITY SURVEILLANCE MONITOR is.
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