Boredom Comics

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#36: Nonstandard standards

Vagabond

on Aug. 3, 2006

Ok Florida, you've been warned before. I tried to look the other way when you forgot how not to elect a dumbass. And I was -this- close to doing something when someone decided to start a statewide movement to ban anyone with any ability to drive on the road. And your goddamn old people… ok, when I actually thought about it, I came to the conclusion that I didn't mind you encouraging old people to move to you, because it meant there would be less of a chance of me seeing them naked.

But now you've gone too far.

You decided that you having a lot of heat wasn't good enough. You had to spread that sickness around to the rest of the Eastern Seaboard. So now, the one bad apple has corrupted the whole bunch, leaving the rest of us to wilt in the heat.

You've forced me to take this action, Florida. You are hearby -exiled- from the United States. We will begin a search for "America's New Wang" in the fall, when the warm Gulf waters will prevent shrinkage from cutting any contestant prematurely.

And Georgia? Don't think I don't know all about the baby, you ignorant slut.


EDIT: I'm going to be at the beach for a week, so I don't know how often I'll be updating. Most likely not at all, so… just touch yourself while you wait for me to come back. Or not. Wouldn't want you going blind just yet.