Last words

Author notes

Oh god! It burns me!

lba

on July 31, 2008

First and foremost, since I don't think I've ever mentioned it: I have a pathological sense of great dislike for puns, cliches, excessive vulgarity ( Vulgarity is great for impact on occasion though. ) and using sex, drugs or other "edgy" material for the sake of pageviews and site hits. I'm very much more preferential to jokes that get people thinking as opposed to the general fare of poop jokes most webcomics provide ( Not to say there's anything wrong with a poop joke once in a while. ). As a subject alone none of the stuff bugs me ( Considering, that I seem to offend my local Christian groups daily it's not likely that I morally object to the vast majority of things there are in the world. ), but I am always wary of overusing jokes about those subjects. For one big reason: it's like you're cheating. Making nothing but pictures of big-breasted women just doesn't appeal to my desire to do things by talent and humor ( Admittedly, there are a number of case that I probably fail spectacularly at this one. ) rather than dildoes or whatever other sex appliance one might prefer ( Although to many, success is measured by how big of a non-existent cup size one can make to appear realistic. ). But, I'm just not that kind of guy. Cup size just isn't enough. There has to be brains involved too ( Somebody has to be able to know when to shut the hell up, and I'm not very good at that. ). But should I ever find the chance to ceaselessly mock such a subject, you can bet I'll be all over it, like a lost mountaineer is all over the St. Bernard bringing him a cask. ( In fact, the truth is, the reason you don't see that many of these dogs out there any more is because that cask is to start a cooking fire, not to drink. ). There isn't much that I enjoy more than making a mockery of every single person, including myself, on the planet. In all honesty, my hope is that by the time Last Words ends, I'll have been able to mock every single social grouping on the planet ( That may include reptoids and/or mice if people can prove the theories right. ). Of course, that may sound incredibly ambitious, but then you realize that the human race is the same group of people who will routinely walk up to a door with at least four signs designating it an exit, and then attempt to enter through it. Then there are the people who will walk into an aisle clearly labeled with 3-foot tall letters "Bolts" and ask for lawn fertilizer. Perhaps they're trying to grow brains in the garden. Perhaps, they're just lost. Perhaps, my dog is almost done with a cold fusion nuclear reactor. So I don't think it will be too hard of a task to mock most of the people in the world. Especially considering that they provide such excellent material for the chicles to work with.

And since I'm talking about messing with the masses, here's a link to go vote for your favorite Drunk Duck comics. Remember to vote for your favorite single-panel humor strip ( Carly needs your love. ).