The Glass Urchin

Author notes

Attack of Babies

auilix

on Sept. 8, 2008

Why do people automatically think that women love babies? You never see people unloading their babies on hapless teenage boys, but as soon a gal is able to hold one, they dump them on you like they’re all you ever wanted in life. I’m not saying I hate them or anything… I’m fine with babies as long as they’re not in my immediate vicinity or screaming like a mofo. I actually kind of like kids, once they’re up to the point in their life when they can say stuff and they learn that staring incessantly isn’t proper human culture. But babies… Yes, show me a picture of yours and I’ll say the appropriate cutesy girl things, but please don’t make me hold them. Actually I think there must be a lot of girls out there like me who refrain from holding or interacting with babies. Last time I held one, it squeezed my boob and everyone laughed. Just cause you’re a baby kiddo, doesn’t mean you can get away with that!!