Thread "Kid's Say The Darndest Things..." in forum "Comic Talk and General Discussion *"

Posted at 6:04PM, Apr. 18, 2011

I have a three year old son, and boy does he have a mouth on him! Sometimes it just plain drives me nuts, but most days I find myself stuck in conversations so strange it's almost surreal. And sometimes he cracks those priceless one-liners that only kids can crack.

I was driving to the store today and stopped at a red light. Stopped next to us was a large U-Haul truck. My three year old son has a fixation on vehicles at the moment and he began to admire it out loud.

"Mom, look! That's a huge truck."

"Well, it's a moving truck."

He laughed at me. "Duh Mom, I can see the wheels."

So what have you overheard a child say that made you do a double take? Anything funny, anything insightful, anything at all!

Posted at 7:04PM, Apr. 18, 2011

hahaha, awwww :D your son sounds adorable.

I used to help out at school sometimes with After School Care, and I remember there were these little girls who always used to play far out games with their imagination. I saw one of them one day had a toy, it looked like a brown rat thing, and I went up and asked what it was. She turns to me and says: "A QUOLL!" I didn't know what a "quoll" was (I do now though, its a marsupial from Australia that's crazy looking and creepy) and I said: "I've never heard of it, what do they look like?"

She frowned, stared at me in all seriousness, held up the toy and said: "They look like this."

She turned away shaking her head in disappointment.

I was kind of left blinking and confused.

Posted at 7:04PM, Apr. 18, 2011

For whatever reason, when my sister was really little, she was convinced that she had a brother(she has two older sisters).

I remember this conversation in particular:
My mom: "No sweetie, you don't have a brother."
My sister: "I do! I do have a bruzzer!"
My mom: "Okay, what's your brother's name then?"
My sister: ….. "I sink…I don't have a bruzzer."

Posted at 8:04PM, Apr. 18, 2011

@Hippie Van:
That's too funny. I once convinced my younger sister that she wasn't blood relation but instead had been adopted. I'd never considered the alternative : "The unaccounted for sibling".

@OnlyFooldAndVikings:

I had to Google it.

I'm sure these things would be a lot less mysterious if we lived in Australia.

Posted at 9:04PM, Apr. 18, 2011

lol, I DO live in australia, and I STILL had no idea what it was.

Posted at 6:04AM, Apr. 19, 2011

Well never tell your autistic cousin something (don't worry I didn't give him cuss).

This is the story:

Was playing NFS2 and I had this idea to say "Taxi" whenever they hit a taxi. So now…whenever he comes over he asks if we can play the taxi game.

Stupid story but DAMN, they got good memories.

Posted at 1:04PM, Apr. 19, 2011

When my youngest brother was about four or five, he had this habit of saying whatever was on his mind, no matter how strange. Usually while we were at the dinner table.

Once while we were eating and nobody was saying anything, he said, "Guess what? One time I farted on a piece of bread and it still tasted good."

Another time he told us about how he made a toothpaste sandwich because he thought it would taste good. But he found out he was wrong.

Later on when he was about seven, at dinner he said, "You know what? I think I'm tired of Barenaked Ladies." My dad, who hadn't ever heard of the band, nearly choked on his bite of food, then looked at my brother with a shocked expression, yelling "WHAT?!"

Posted at 3:04PM, Apr. 19, 2011

These are great stories!

The two I have are both about my daughter when she was 3. I found them very instructive - if I am a good parent, it's because my kids trained me.

It was her 3rd birthday and the family was over. The table needed clearing at the same time I was trying to get candles on the cake. My daughter wandered into the kitchen. "Hi, honey," I said, "Why don't you bring in your dirty plate?" Her response: "Why don't you?" [she wasn't being fresh, she was being logical. lesson learned: if I want her to do something, don't make it a question]

Then another time was when we were in a grocery store that had exceptionally narrow aisles, at the same time every one else was there, too. My daughter was sitting in the shopping cart with a good view of the congestion, and saw that we couldn't round the end of the aisle because we were blocked by a woman of significant size.
Suddenly, this little 3-year old belted out: Come On! COME ON!! MOVE IT! MOVE IT!! [lesson learned: she hears what I say to the other drivers on the road]

Posted at 4:04PM, Apr. 19, 2011

Hawk, I laughed so loud I woke my baby up from her nap, darn you.

Ayes, your daughter sounds sweet. :)

Some notable mentions from the past few weeks:

"Mom, when I grow up will I be fat?"

"Mom, am I a boy or a space ranger?"

"Mom, are we stuck in obnoxious traffic again?" <– [He's three, how did he learn obnoxious?!]

And my favorite happened this morning. My son came in the wake me up. Still half asleep he grabbed my hand and fairly dragged me out of bed. I playfully whined at him that I wanted "Five more minutes," to which he replied "Mom, if you stay in bed I can't have any adventures with you today!"

Needless to say, I got up.