Elijah and Azuu

Author notes

#992 Youth: Up to No Good

Inkmonkey

on April 13, 2006

Most creatures I see in video games that are just pointy rocks tend to have the ability to float, for whatever reason. It's always a bit odd to see those kind of things like creatures (like the Thwomps from Mario), when they could just easily just be lumps of rock. They usually just sit in place and drop on you; or roll down hills, or just sit in place and wait for you to bump into them. That can't be much of a life; floating and/or sitting around, waiting for a hero to wander nearby so you can try to crush them. I can't imagine them having much of a social life, and as far as I'm aware there are no females of any "pointy rock that tries to sit on you" species. I'm starting to wonder whether Azuu's spiky friend was originally a more logical demon that was turned into that thing as punishment for doing something stupid.

Hell, what am I saying? I'm writing the damn thing.

Okay, so this dude's name is… Paul. Paul the demon. And he was delivering snacks to the high lard… Attania. Anyway, he accidentally let a blue M&M mix with the brown M&Ms, and as punishment Attania turned him into that talking rock thing for 400 years or 3000 miles (whichever comes first). So now he sits around, hoping people will kick him down hills so he can accumulate enough mileage to cut his punishment short.

This has been storytime with Inkmonkey, who has apparently gone insane. Tune in on Monday for the story of Terry; the irresponsible goblin.