Smug I Could Do
Author notes
When I was a baby I must have swallowed a neodymium rare earth chick magnet because I cannot keep the ladies off of my jock. Heh. Take today for example, I was at Office Depot buying some art supplies* when I saw this banging hottie. I followed her across the street to the Barnes & Noble and in the store she saw me looking at her and our eyes met. BAM! INSTANT CONNECTION!
I followed her to the register where she was paying for her less than stellar choice in literature.** Quickly I saddled up behind her to get a good look at her driver's licence and whispered in her ear, "Shandra? That's a lovely name." and damn if she didn't jump three feet in the air like she had been shocked. I guess you could say there were literally sparks between us. I. AM. ELECTRIC.
*No not pens you ass. A couple of reams of paper. I'm a writer and Dunhill 20.lb 8.5 x 11 is my canvas and the HP Laserjet is my brush.
**DAVE EGGERS!? Bitch please. You want some ranch dressing to go with your word salad? Heh.
Comments
Please login to comment.
Login or Register${ comment.author }} at
${ comment.author }} at