Smug I Could Do

Author notes

webcomics heh

on May 10, 2009

Let's be honest. Most chicks aint too brite.* If you're a total double-decker babewich with a slice of cheesecake for dessert then why would you waste your time and money** squirting out some anklebiter who will pretty much gaurantee that you never go anywhere or do anything ever again? Also, once you have a kid you better make sure to hang on to that man because if you're a single mom you will be SOL because no bro with a brain in his head is going to waste his time raising some other dude's nublet.***

Me. I got it figured out. I'm living my life with total freedom and instead of wasting my bux on some kid I can enjoy the luxuries**** that being a PROFESSIONAL WRITER affords me thank you very much.


*The OCTOMOM!? That's what pregnancy does, it makes you crazy.
**Time and $$$ aren't the only things you lose. Having a kid also blows out your Ashton Cootcher. (Bonus Bhonnerism. BOOYAH!)
***Secret Bro Tip: Single moms make for an easy target for some easy booty calling. Just act all supportive and shit.
****Xbox 360, massage chair, netflix membership, eating out at Applebee's, etc.

PS: Happy Belated Mothers' Day! Sorry I forgot to call.