Secret Dens of Evil

Privacy. It’s something we come to appreciate even in our early childhood, don’t we. Forming our own little secret club in a tree house we keep in a remote spot in someones backyard somewhere, for which only our closest friends, and schoolmates of common interests and preferences, may enter. Even more so it is appreciated by villains, in reality and particularly in fiction.

It’s not an easy job being a big villain after all. You gotta work hard, long and tirelessly on your projects to overthrow the status quo and/or terrorize the public. You gotta have your back covered, making sure that your goons are incentivized properly, or terrified of you properly, to keep rolling with your evil program.

And on top of that you got enemies to keep at bay, be it law enforcement or secret agents or superheroes or other villains. What you of course need is a secret den of evil. A place that only you and those within your innermost circle know off, where you can plot and scheme and do your naughty stuff in peace.

We’ve witnessed many different secret dens of evil throughout fiction. Most commonly in spy fiction and superhero comics. From hidden nightclubs, laboratories and dungeons to deep jungle- or -remote island complexes. From bases of operations underwater, and in outer space, to mobile fortresses lurking underground (such as the Technodrome in the old TMNT Cartoon franchise).

Sometimes these hidden lairs may be cost efficient and located in a place no one would ever think of looking. Other times they may be something really massive and perhaps a little bit too on the nose to be kept secret for that long, or vice versa.

Supervillains have a rather funny habit of choosing and/or building their secret den of evil in a way that really, really goes in lockstep with their personality and their motif. The Joker tends to always hang out in a theme park or a toy factory somewhere (though let’s face it, it’s probably intentional in his case. He probably really just wants Batman to find him so they can have their playtime together in there. No pun intended).

Doctor Octopus, being the incredibly resourceful and ambitious scientist and inventor that he is, likes to build these massive secret underwater lairs a couple of hundred feet underneath the New York harbour, with electrified floors and walls AND laser turrets.

Man! Crime must really pay if you can afford that kind of crib:P I don’t even wanna think about the electrical bill you’d have to pay to run the place - As a certain friendly neighbourhood Spiderman might say jokishly.

I’m gonna be frank with you readers. If I was a supervillain I’d probably do the same mistake of making my secret den of evil a bit TOO Helixfinger-ish to be kept secret for too long. Being able to scheme and build death machines in privacy is one thing, but you gotta show people how cool and devil-icous your secret dungeon is, you know^^ Especially when you’ve been stuck in it for too long due to a certain global pandemic, am i right?:P

So what are your thoughts on secret dens of evil? What would your hidden base of operations be if you were a villain that can afford one of those? Is there anyone in particular you’d let in to your secret den, or anyone you’d definitely keep out of your secret den?

Let me know in the comments. And I assure you that the location of your secret den of evil will remain secret with me—I promise (Holding my fingers crossed behind my back. Which where I’m from means I just lied to you^^).

Helixfinger out!