Alright then. I'll give every twenty minutes to get any last minute votes in. In the meantime, I need a shower.
Oh and everyone has voted seventy2 since the last update, so yeah.
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Mafia XLI: Crash Landing
Final Narration!
The remaining troops assembled around the dais that had been the place where suspected traitors had been shot.
"Well," said the People's Recruiter Lieutenant in an uncharacteristically good mood, "We seem to be doing pretty good. Now, who's the Chief."
"ME!"
Every turned towards seventy2 dressed as Rambo.
"And I challenge you to MORTAL KOMBAT!"
"Okay, your weapon?"
"This knife!"
The crowd shuffled back as seventy2 executed an amazing display of showmanship with a very long very sharp knife.
"Ready," asked Salsa.
"Always!"
BOOM!
[spoiler]
Seventy2 the Chief shoulda brought a gun.
[/spoiler]
"Okay, now that that's ov- Where's D_Dude and Product Placement?"
—-
"Check in three," said Product Placement as he finished moving a rook into position to begin his end-game.
"Yeah, yeah," replied D_Dude, the medic that had kept watch over the tank driver since they had both been drafted. He picked up and moved a pawn to threaten the rook.
"Well, look at it this way, your game has gotten remarkable better," said Product.
"I guess it's because I always have to play a master."
The hatch quietly opened as the Recon Pilot slipped through. He brought his knife up to the same height as D_Dude's throat. D_Dude began to move a piece, seemingly oblivious to the danger he was in.
Seemingly oblivious is not the same as oblivious as the Recon pilot felt a prick in his arm and suddenly fell unconscience.
[spoiler]
therealtj the Recon Pilot has been caught.
[/spoiler]
"Checkmate," said D_Dude as if nothing had happened.
"Well, I'll be."
—-
After hearing that the Recon Pilot had been caught, Gullas had once again found himself in the company of Ochi and TFGM.
He was busy ignoring them as they talked about how scared they had been and how upset Ochi was that crocty hadn't killed her.
That's when 1337 the Black Ops attack Gullas.
"Whoa! Watch where you point that thing!"
"But you're the Chief I just KNOW it!"
"But he just had his brains blown out!"
"OH! That's what you want me to think!"
Gullas and 1337 argued as Ochi became more distraught– and angry. Finally fed up with being ignored by the three guys around her she pulled out the grenade that Crocty had shot at her.
"FINE! If you won't listen to me, maybe crocty will!"
"Where did you get that thing?"
Ochi didn't care to answer. Instead, she pulled the pin and laughed gleefully at her impending demise. 1337 ran away as fast as his legs could carry him. TFGM dived for cover.
Gullas throw Ochi at 1337.
[spoiler]
Ochi teh INFINTOPS and 1337 the Black Ops are now devising against their rivals!
[/spoiler]
—-
Salsa sighed as he finished the report. HE rubbed his eyes and reached for the bottle of whiskey he hadn't finished off when he got drunk and shivered as the caustic fluid ate at his innards.
HE never even knew the FRO had taken the orbitals.
"ATTENTION HUMBUG GARRISON! YOU WILL SURRENDER AT ONCE!"
"Sir," asked A Reaver wondering if he should surrender.
"Do it."
"Why?"
"BECAUSE I HATE HATE HATE HUMBUG!"
The end.
you won the battle on the planet, but if you read the galactic updates, the Humbug was being destroyed by the FRO in the war.
I was going to turn the votes in the harko-crocty debacle, but when salsa hadn't updated, i held my vote waiting for an update. I went to eat for 20 minutes, came back, and the narration had been put up.
So i just gave up. if my friends don't live, i don't deserve to. i tried to break many people's legs, but everyone was pretty well protected this round.
you won the battle on the planet, but if you read the galactic updates, the Humbug was being destroyed by the FRO in the war.
I was going to turn the votes in the harko-crocty debacle, but when salsa hadn't updated, i held my vote waiting for an update. I went to eat for 20 minutes, came back, and the narration had been put up.
So i just gave up. if my friends don't live, i don't deserve to. i tried to break many people's legs, but everyone was pretty well protected this round.
Fine. Ill write my own narration. With blackjack… and hookers….
In fact forget the narration.
Coulda swore I was right.
I am the most useful man on earth.
I am so useful that I had to be killed in an impossible manner.
Ochi couldn't possibly have been thrown at me.
People don't throw people, people.
Shouldn't my kill have gone in first, since there's only a 99% chance anyone sent their action in before me since I sent it in right after the narration, and henceforth, I be the killer of Gullas?
(wait…paranoid…what?)
THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!!!
(sorry, chips)
Coulda swore I was right.
I am the most useful man on earth.
I am so useful that I had to be killed in an impossible manner.
Ochi couldn't possibly have been thrown at me.
People don't throw people, people.
Shouldn't my kill have gone in first, since there's only a 99% chance anyone sent their action in before me since I sent it in right after the narration, and henceforth, I be the killer of Gullas?
(wait…paranoid…what?)
THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!!!
(sorry, chips)
Woah woah woah… you got day kills?!
Man… this game must have been what was causing my head aches.
I've been spacing out this entire time.
Uh guess now is a bad time to mention that the next GM election thread is up.
Sorry you guys feel that way about the narration. As seventy2 pointed out, the HUMBUG Military was totally inept and had no strategic thinking. It was also more concerned about a beauty pageant in the middle of a WAR. Plus it made me chuckle a little. And you could still continue on. Overthrow the current owners of the Townston System, take over HUMBUG, win the war and shoot the idiot of a GM you got saddled with. Note, I never did say what happened after I gave the order to surrender.
So really what happens next is up to you.
All right, all right, I give.
Narration +1!
Product Placement looked out over the vast Armada he had commanded to final victory. The fight against the FRO had been long and hard, and the fight against the HUMBUG's bureaucratic machinery had been even harder. But, thanks to Emperor A Reaver and the help of General 1337, he was now over the FRO capital aboard the ITNS Rokulily.
"Admiral Placement," his Flag Lieutenant began, and Product motioned for him to continue, "We have their reply. The accept the terms of surrender. He's being sent up now."
"Excellent."
He looked to his second in command. Commodore D_Dude and he still played Chess and, Product had to admit, his tactical instincts were very good. He returned his gaze to bridge's viewport, and the jewel of a planet below.
"Well, my friend. It looks like we have arrived."
"Indeed, sir," D_Dude looked at his commanding officer, "and I have to say it's been a pleasure to be at your side."
"Likewise."
They both looked out at the serene vista as the quiet took over once more. Then, the flag lieutenant returned from wherever he had gone.
"Sir, their shuttle docked a few minutes and Captain Niccea is escorting him to the place, sir."
"Good, Inform Commodore Monkey he is to over see things while the commodore and I attend to ah– an item of business."
"At once, sir"
—-
Ex-People's Recruiter Lieutenant (Lower Middle Grade) Salsa stood at the far end the firing range that was there, officially any way, for the marines use. To day it was for something different.
"Salsa, for the crimes of Treason, Desertion of duty, and Cowardice, you are sentenced to death by firing squad. Any last words."
"Um, where's the firing squad."
"You are looking at it," Replied Admiral Product Placement as he raised his pistol and squeezed the trigger.
[spoiler]
People's Recruiter Lieutenant (Lower Middle Grade) Salsa the GM has joined the ranks of those he shot.
[/spoiler]
I hope you're all a little more satisfied with this one.
I'll have to admit… I would very much like to know how on earth we went from being surrounded by an enemy armada, hovering over our town to taking over H.U.M.B.U.G. AND leading it to victory.
I'm gonna assume some serious bad assery.
Satisfied.So you're now the artist who was formally known as Same, changed it to A reaver and is now Same again?
I'll have to admit… I would very much like to know how on earth we went from being surrounded by an enemy armada, hovering over our town to taking over H.U.M.B.U.G. AND leading it to victory.
I'm gonna assume some serious bad assery.Satisfied.So you're now the artist who was formally known as Same, changed it to A reaver and is now Same again?
The title tawwfkascitarainsa would be too hard to remember?
I used abilities to confirm Hark, Ayes, TJ, and Anthony.
I solved clues for Crocty, Seventy2, BFF, and Gullas.
This is in case you got killed or lynched out of nowhere and were wondering why.
After ensuring his death, I vowed to Crocty that even if I survived, I would request to commit suicide with his grenade. Thus I faithfully avenged him, though I orchestrated his demise. This is the heart and soul of responsible rivalry.
I'll have to admit… I would very much like to know how on earth we went from being surrounded by an enemy armada, hovering over our town to taking over H.U.M.B.U.G. AND leading it to victory.Don't you see, this is where we fill the void with shitty fanfiction about ourselves. I'll be the wistful but no-nonsense ghost with nothing to lose who appears sometimes to tell you guys about your own powers.
Forgot to say, I like what Salsa did with the narrations. Like, framing narratives in other narratives, having extra bulletins, having an overarching story and world and such. I could tell he'd been planning the game for a long time.
Didn't you have a whole spiel on your page about how you had made it impossible to get back on your account?
I did but then I remembered I have security questions on my old email account.
But, I mean, it's like dedicating your life to martial arts and burning down your house so you can never turn back then immediately going back and building a new house.
You just don't do it.
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