Thread "Mr. Riot Jokes!" in forum "I'm With Riot"

Posted at 3:07PM, Jul. 3, 2007

Much like Chuck Norris jokes, we will tell jokes about how awesome Riot is because he is awesome and our awesomeness could never match his. Such as…

Mr. Riot is so strong that when he does push ups, he doesn't push up…he pushes the earth down!

Your turn!

Posted at 9:07PM, Jul. 3, 2007

Mr.Riot's tears can cure cancer..too bad Mr.Riot never cries.

Posted at 10:07PM, Jul. 3, 2007

Mr. Riot once allowed the Queen of England to sit on his chair. After a few minutes he promptly removed it causing the Queen to fall to the ground rather unceremoniously.
She got up and thanked him for allowing her to use the chair for that brief moment in time; and that being so close to him was like a slice of heaven on earth with shredded angel sprinkles.

Posted at 4:07AM, Jul. 4, 2007

When god said "Let there be Light!", Mr. Riot said "Say Please first."

Posted at 9:07PM, Jul. 4, 2007

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Mr.Riot allows to live.

Mr. Riot doesn't play god. Playing is for children

Posted at 6:07PM, Jul. 5, 2007

Mr. Riot doesn't sleep, Mr. Riot waits…

Posted at 11:07AM, Jul. 6, 2007

However, if Mr.Riot does sleep, he sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

Posted at 4:07PM, Jul. 6, 2007

What was going through the minds of all of Mr. Riots victims before they died? His shoe.

Posted at 6:07PM, Jul. 8, 2007

Mr.Riot's blood is pure alcohol. Drinking said alcohol is said to give the drinker the ability to breathe underwater. It's a shame that no one has ever gotten close enough to do so.

Posted at 7:07PM, Jul. 8, 2007

Mr. Riot went to visit the virgin Islands. Now they're just called the Islands.

The sun doesn't shine on Mr. Riot, Mr. Riot shines on the sun.

Posted at 7:07AM, Jul. 9, 2007

Mr. Riot isn't hung like a horse, a horse is hung like Mr. Riot.

Posted at 4:07PM, Jul. 10, 2007

The Bermuda Triangle is actually Mr.Riot,Zac,and Volte6 in an epic game of hungry hungry hippos.

Posted at 8:07AM, Jul. 11, 2007

Every night Arnold Schwarzenegger crys himself to sleep, knowing that even in his youth his muscles were never as good as Riot's.

Posted at 9:07AM, Jul. 11, 2007

Mr. Riot is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Posted at 5:07PM, Jul. 11, 2007

After taking one look at Mr. Riot all future Mr. Universe competions were deamed unnessesary

Posted at 2:07AM, Jul. 12, 2007

DaVinci's paintbrush was said to be made of the beard of Mr. Riot. It's really how he was able to make all those pretty paintings.
How was Mr. Riot alive during DaVinci's time?
easy…Riot is eternal.

Posted at 3:07AM, Jul. 12, 2007

Mr. Riot recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

Mr. Riot doesn't have furniture, he has Chuck Norris.

Posted at 7:07AM, Jul. 14, 2007

Holy crap, guys…these are hilarious!

Hilarious….and true.

Posted at 8:07AM, Jul. 14, 2007

Holy crap, guys…these are hilarious!

Hilarious….and true.

Even the energy drink one!?

Posted at 12:07PM, Jul. 14, 2007

Mr. Riot is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

They blame global warming on green house gases we let go into the atmosphere. This is untrue, Mr. Riot was just cold and felt like turning up the heat.

You know the the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after reading Anti-Social by Mr. Riot.

Posted at 1:07PM, Jul. 14, 2007

Holy crap, guys…these are hilarious!

Hilarious….and true.
Even the energy drink one!?

No comment.

Posted at 1:07PM, Jul. 15, 2007

Here is evidence that people were worshipping Riot as far back as Ancient Greece:

Back then they called him Zeus.

Posted at 7:07PM, Jul. 15, 2007

When Riot hits someone with his chair the person dies instantly. Thus no one has been able to tell the tale.

This is a lie however. One person has survived to tell the tale. All he could say was "Ouch that was awesome." Right after those words his head exploded from pure awesomeness.

(These are the reasons why I am not on team Zac.)

Posted at 12:07AM, Jul. 16, 2007

Holy crap, guys…these are hilarious!

Hilarious….and true.
Even the energy drink one!?

No comment.

I am never drinking redbull again… lol

Posted at 2:07AM, Jul. 16, 2007

I got the Red Bull one off a website, but I came up with the furniture one myself.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Mr Riot.

Mr Riot can slam a revolving door.

Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1MRFCS (Mr Riot Folding Chair Slam).

Another group of scientists claims to have built a time machine and gathered video evidence that proves that the Big Bang was a MRFCS. Unfortunately, the camera was destroyed by the sheer glory of it.