Whoa this is a deep thread.
My current boyfriend and I were friends and hung out so much we were just kinda like "we're dating aren't we?" but if you know me then you know that him and I came together under very "weird" circumstances ;)
I just hope I don't end up getting burned too! (it totally shouldn't be working out, but it is so far!)
and I must give a big comforting hug to all the dumped people and people with sad stories…I do feel for ya!
and a big congrats to ms. leopardprints… yah i totally feel bipolar now!
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Comic Talk and General Discussion *
love and friendship.
About three years ago I broke up with my girl after a relationship of about 1,5 years. We've been best friends ever since, an we each had other relationships, but even now, three years later, every time I see her I get that same feeling I had when I first met her.
She's been seeing a guy for a fair while now, and truth be told, the guy's awesome. I hang out at their place (Well, her place, he's just there untill he gets his place fixed up) and have a great time talking to both of them, but under the surface there's still that hint of jealousy when she kisses him or something like that.
I haven't worked up the courage to tell her though…I've been trying to for several months now, ever since I found out that I still loved her, to tell her about the way I feel, but I'm affraid it'll mess up our friendship. She's the best friend I've got and probably ever will have, so I don't want to ruin anything, but I don't think it's fair to just pretend there's nothing going on, either.
I'll probably find the time to tell her, eventually, but I don't think it'll happen any time soon. Everytime I tell myself I'm gonna talk about it, as soon as she walks in, I chicken out. It'll happen though, some day. Or at least that's what I keep promising myself.
WTH? If you broke up with her then it's over. Either you're just friends or you're nothing. Unless she's been giving you signals?
Don't be clingy like that. It'll just get weird and then you won't be friends with her anymore (which may be the best thing).
Man, this is why you can't be friends with guys.
Once upon a time I became desparately in love with this girl who started as a friend I met in college.
Back when I was ill-equipped and unprepared for the harsh reality of so-called "relationships".
Based on after-failure analysis, what got me to fall in love with her… was practically the tone of her voice and her smell. Basically prolonged exposure to it. It got to my head enough to disable my rational thought process and make dominant… the thoughts of my other head.
I was brainwashed… in such a way that I made the world revolve around her and did stupid things.
It didnt work out in the end when I "proposed"… so it hurt me really really bad. Enough to alter my thought process. That experience actually HAD GOOD EFFECTS… after going through the depressive-alchoholic-suicidal stage…
Which are:
1) It reinforced something told to me by a priest: "You should think with the head between the shoulders and not the head between your legs. That is why God created you in such a way that your LARGER HEAD IS ABOVE YOUR SMALLER HEAD"
2) It made me more cynical and sarcastic. Its a good thing because its like an armor that protects me from exploitation. Ironically, my cynicism and sarcasm got me more RESPECT from other people around me.
3) It altered my mind state. Now I am 100x more difficult to "fall" in love. After that experience, I obsessively read about psychology… both mainstream and the other offensive stuff (TRUTH hurts like a bitch isnt it? lol! ) For me to be seduced again, you have to be at least an S-Ranked-super-elite-military-grade seducer…
4) It got me fodder for MAG-ISA. Though it will be exagerrated in that comic of course (a future chapter… just in case you follow it). I'm a master of exagerration and I could be employed in the propaganda department if communism takes over my country lol!
Yeah my first college crush inspired me to draw my first comic book epic. Man, it was sappy. If I posted it I'm sure I'd get tons of fangirls, but I have too much self-respect.
DO IT!!! OMG I FEEL SO KAWAII!!!! AND POST IT UP IN DRUNKDUCK!!! SINCE YOU DRAW PRETTY GOOD, PLEASE PUT SO MANY BISHOUNENS IN IT OK!!! ^^ XD lol!
would it be completly insane to say that i formed this out of arguing with this person?
not really.
Me and my girlfriend, before we even were friends, hated eachother's guts. We got stuck in a room together (because one of my friends was a friend of her friends and they decided to play a little joke on us just to see what would happen.) we both got bored and started talking. voila.
FRIENDSHIP
and a little bit of intercourse…
[spoiler]just kidding of course… I was only 11 at the time :P[/spoiler]
If you're getting mixed signals and you want to confront her about it, the best way is to do it in a casual and flirty way while keeping the avenue for seriousness open. That way, she can confirm your suspicions if she feels the same way, but you give her a back door out if she doesn't, so that you can both just laugh about it and forget about it, without it making things all weird.
However I still think it's a delusion.
WTH? If you broke up with her then it's over. Either you're just friends or you're nothing. Unless she's been giving you signals?
Don't be clingy like that. It'll just get weird and then you won't be friends with her anymore (which may be the best thing).
Man, this is why you can't be friends with guys.
There's been times that it seemed like there were signals, but I wasn't exactly sure. And I'm not clingy. It'snot like I'm around her all the time. There's times that we dont'speack to eachother for weeks, and there's time we see eachother almost every day, but I'm not forcing anything.
I'm happy with things as they are, and I'll be the last person to try and change things, but like I said, sometimes I still get that feeling when I see her. I can't help it.
wouldnt it be cool to just be a psychopath so that relationships would be much much easier? lol!
Freudian slips of the tongue (indicative of mental conflict)
Guilt feelings (covered up, but wants to be punished for something)
Uses defense mechanism of projection (blaming others for own faults)
Uses defense mechanism of displacement (ditching, self-handicapping, settling for 2nd best, being own worst enemy, but feels entitled to something or being 1st)
Oral fixation (smokes or always has to have something in mouth)
Oedipus complex (or other love/hate relationship with parents)
Comes from dysfunctional family or broken home (absent or abusive father)
Impervious to fear, anxiety, depression, or remorse (unremorseful) Superficially charming, a real cool cat (manipulative and conning)
Inability to love or express emotions deeply, can't respond to kindness (cold)
Pathological lying (for no reason at all, can't help self)
No self-insight (doesn't reflect much upon own personality makeup)
No self-humor (can't stand to be the butt of jokes or can't laugh at self)
A fairly high IQ (good grades in school or disparity in achievement) Uses neologisms (makes up strange new words, abbreviations, or sayings)
Fascination with fire (or death, or purified ways to destroy something)
Cruelty to animals (or doesn't like animals)
Lack of probity, courtesy, or doesn't tolerate society's "niceties" or obligations
Moody, obsessive-compulsive, suffers from one or more phobias
Does not tend to learn from mistakes unless immediate punishment given
Lack of formal-operational thinking (tends to think in concrete, black-or-white terms)
Identity conflict (often with delayed adolescence, hasn't grown up in certain ways)
Preconventional morality (thinks things are wrong only because it might lead to punishment or it's not in his/her best interests right now, failure to understand disparities between own behavior and socially acceptable behavior, often in trouble with law)
omg, there is no such thing as a "psychopath." If you even read the page you got that from it mentions the various different ways "psychopathy" has been argued about.
Sorry, I'm a psychology major and I've taken some sociology, and DSM-IV style checklists usually really bother me. Especially when they're basically folklore, like that one.
I don't know what to say about the pyscho thing. I WAS a psychology major for several years, but there's so much in fighting and bitching amongst people facts are too hard to get down. Maybe if in fifty years or something I was just then being 18 and could study it in my flying space college, I'd be all for it.
I use content analysis. It's a wet blanket for men trying to impress you.
I also like encyclopedic knowledge. Also a wet blanket for men trying to impress you.
Men find me intimidating, but well… what can a girl do? lol!
act like a dizzy easily impressed broad.
Seems to work for a lot of women.
Can't say it has impressed me.
I always appreciated my wife's intelligence.
One of the major things I love about her…
besides her fun-bags!
at like a dizzy easily impressed broad.
But what would that get me? A ditsy guy with a brittle yet overblown self esteem. lol!
That would be working at cross purposes, ne? ;)
And I yet do not really understand what those women accomplish by acting like that. Neither love nor friendship for sure and self-esteem? Nope- more like loose what's left of it.
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